Answer for Leelee-RE: Representing with Pride

[Totems4jt]

Jay Tavare

Jul 2, 05 - 1:12 PM For LeeLee.

leelee asks...

Hi Jay,

I am having a hard time with being so far from the rez. I don't have anyone to speak the language with me unless I am on the net. I can pray to Wakan Tanka anywhere but often miss others that understand and share the traditional ways. Some people don't even know that reservations still exist. I run into alot of ignorance. Some of it is lack of knowledge where some of it is just prejudice. I find myself having to bite my tongue so often because I am in an area where I am the minority. My dealings have often left me feeling mad, sad and frustrated. I am VERY proud of my heritage and continue to carry on tradition with my daughter. I want to be able guide her down the red road but anger sometimes takes me off.

My question to you is how do you deal with these type of situations? What is your remedy for this evil?

I thank you for taking the time to reply. I know you must be a busy guy.

Wopila Tanka (Big Thanks)
Lee Lee



Jay Writes...

Washta Leelee, or as we say in Apache land Nesh Ta Gol Teh, how is it with you? My sister when I read your letter I felt your frustration but let me tell you whenever you are away from your Tribe you are an ambassador. It's your job to educated and enlighten whoever you come across with. There is no better weapon to defend yourself against prejudice than knowledge. Take the ancient knowledge of the Lakhotas and let it be a guiding light in your life which then will shine the path ahead for your daughter. Anytime we feel anger, hate , and frustrations that make us mad. You should look at such times as an opportunity to grow. The feelings you feel is our own weaknesses and by just changing your perspective you will see there is no need to get mad. You have a job to do as every one of us have. I have been there and I tell you I read and learned and spoke to elders and took that knowledge and when I was confronted by ignorance and prejudice I smiled as I knew here was my opportunity to change another human being for the better by sharing all that I have learned. The next time folks ask you about your Tribe let them know that the Lakhotas where the Seven council fires and their name meant allies as they stood together no matter what. When I started to rescue dogs and wolves, I quickly learned they respond to audio tones and if I showed anger or frustration in my voice they would feel my emotions and since I was trying to rehabilitate them from their nightmares that they had endured in the shelter or before they got there. I had to control myself and you should remember that you have your daughter and every time you get mad in front of her or bring that emotion home to her she will be effected by it. So let it go and look at life on the red path and all it's challenges as an opportunity to grow and learn and teach and find the joy in it... cause that is the path to a meaningful life my friend.
I pray for both of you and know in your heart that Wakan Tanka is with you at every step.
JT>
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Miss Davis

Jul 2nd, 2005 - 1:19 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Jay,

Thank you for your caring and insighful reply to LeeLee. I'm sure she'll appreciate it very much, when she reads it. I'm glad you loath predjudice and ignorance as much as I do.

Thanks again for giving us your time.

Holler at cha later,

Miss Davis
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Running Red Fox

Jul 2nd, 2005 - 1:29 PM For LeeLee.

Congradulations LeeLee.

Hi Jay, as always your words are very inspirational and enlightening and promotes much courage and strength.

Thank you for sharing.
RRF
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Claire Valencia

Jul 2nd, 2005 - 2:04 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Hi Leelee,

You have come to the right place, asked the right person, and received the right answer. Jay always seem to come through with his wisdom reassurance and eloquence.

I've found this forum to be a great place to seek comfort and support. Somehow, inspight of our difference, we are the same and truly feel like a tribe. Thanks for doing that Jay.

Take care Leelee,

C.V.
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leelee

Jul 2nd, 2005 - 7:01 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Jay,

I thank you for your words of wisdom. Sometimes one needs to be reminded how a negative can become a positive. Thanks for the reminder. I know that of which you speak to be true and will seek this knowledge for guidance in future encounters. I wish a life for my daughter that is free of these complications and will seek to provide such for her.

Thank you very much. Pilamaya.

LeeLee
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Dazzle

Jul 2nd, 2005 - 11:07 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Welcome LeeLee

I understand your pain on somewhat of a diffent level, still prejudice, indiffence and injustice are all the same - stupidity and ignorance.

Many times our fellow man just doesn't know any better. There are probably many who have only seen a Native American person on TV and assoiciate their feelings and thoughts from the various uneducated stereotypes they've seen and/or heard. We must look past that, and it can be painful. But those people need to know the truth, and through your positive example they can adjust.

Good luck,
Dazzle

P.S. Chief Jay.... gotta love you I'm sure your answer will be helpful to, not just the few, but the many.
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jeffgordongal_24

Jul 3rd, 2005 - 5:16 AM Re: For LeeLee.

LeeLee,

I echo what Dazz has written. Stay strong my friend and know that you are in our thoughts and prayers.

You are a precious and beautiful soul and unfortunately there are a lot of cruel and ignorant people in the world who wound us who have tender, loving and true hearts/souls.

Don't let them ever take away that beautiful spirit of yours or the light that is within your soul sweetie.

I will hold you in my heart, thoughts and prayers. Stay strong and know that you are loved.

Kath

NATIVE BLESSING

MAY YOU HAVE THE STRENGTH
OF EAGLES' WINGS,
THE FAITH AND COURAGE TO
FLY TO NEW HEIGHTS,
AND THE WISDOM
OF THE UNIVERSE
TO CARRY YOU THERE
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Julie

Jul 3rd, 2005 - 4:04 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Once again Jay, well said!

LeeLee, I wish you all the best.
[e-mail]
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jeffgordongal_24

Jul 5th, 2005 - 7:39 AM Re: For LeeLee.

Jay,

What a beautiful and caring response to LeeLee. Very right on too.

Thanks for being such a loving, caring person who truly cares about your fans instead of being into yourself like so many many actors are.

You make me so proud to be your fan and you know what? All your fans here reflect the essence of you and your kind, caring heart. I have found all of them to be so compassionate, empathetic, loving and kind and THAT says a lot about the man that has drawn us all together here. THANK YOU, Jay for being such a great, down-to-earth "real" person, and such a caring
man.

I know you have helped LeeLee (and others) a great deal with your replies. It's very sweet and special that you take time to answer your fans.

Take care and be well,
Kathy
Your Location: [e-mail]
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Bonnie518

Jul 5th, 2005 - 8:15 AM Re: For LeeLee.

I am one of the ignorant ones, LeeLee. Please forgive anything I say or do that might offend you. It is not my intention. I do want to learn all I can about the Lakota/Native Indians... their language, their ways. Speaking from experience, in all my years, I've never felt that I've belonged until I began to learn who I really am. If you teach me, I will work hard and learn as much as I can... May the Great Spirit watch over and Bless You and your daughter in all your ways. I am at your service. And hopefully someday will earn the right to be called 'your sister'.
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Ms.Muse

Jul 8th, 2005 - 10:35 AM For LeeLee.


Quote
"A clean and sensitive conscience;
A steadfast and scrupulous integrity in small things as well as great; is the most valuable of all possessions, to a nation as to an individual."
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FrancoiseDB

Jul 8th, 2005 - 10:25 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Hi LeeLee, Hi Jay
I was born many miles from these shores, although I do not share the same heritage I am a displaced person living in a land were everything was foreign to me in the beginning. With time I finally adapted and now I am a citizen of the world. Although I never forgot my roots and who I am, I can accept other customs and a different way of life. My heart is buried accross the ocean and will remain there, at times I feel like someone who was amputed from an arm or a leg and can still feel the pain in the missing part. Once I went back I thought for good, but I could not put back the pieces of my being together, something was still missing, what I had left behind in my new home. So I flew back over the ocean and returned to the U.S. Now I can better cope with the isolation, not being able to speak the language I learned as a child and not being able to share in the traditions of my birth. The best cure is to learn the culture and ways of others and teach them your own. Always retain in your heart the love for your people and be proud of who you are.
Fran
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sh mo / blueJay

Sep 10th, 2006 - 9:04 PM Re: For LeeLee.

As often in life, i was looking for one thing, but found another instead This was a beautiful thread, good for a reminder and new Site Sisters, and guys, might enjoy reading it over.

Tis true, knowledge is power, and can lead the way to wisdom and understanding. I have appreciated getting to learn alot from the posts and threads on the Forum. Things i never would have learned or thought about otherwise. Knowing about different cultures and customs can make such a difference. For example; i've heard that if a person can't look you in the eye, that means they must be lying / lie-ing. But, (tell me if i have messed this up too much), my Dad got an issue of Arizona Highways (love that mag), and there was an article on the O'otham Nation of Southern Arizona. [ i hope i do not get this incorrect, but messing things up seems to be one of my specialties is life, please step in and correct me if i am wrong, i don't have the issue, and my Dad gave his away] Part of the manners is to not look someone in the eye. So, coming from a culture where not looking in the eye = lie-ing, a person might think, "Why those O'otham, they're a bunch of liars." [/li][li]. But, from the O'otham point of view, looking a person in the eye is a BIG invasion of privacy. I have heard that the Tara-who-mara of Mexico, i am not spelling that right, like a 'personal space' of about 3-4 FEET. In, some cultures going up an giving others a big ol' hug and kiss is a show of affection. But, for the Tara-who-mara, not giving hug and kiss is a show of personal respect. I don't know how or why cultural manners & all come about, but i looooooooove, love, to learn. To me, learning is one of the best things in life. Don't you just love it when those synapses get working.

How does the saying go?...."what is the difference between ignorance and stupidity? ignorance is cure-able, but stupidity is terminal."

Anyways, i do appreciate when you all post and tell, explain, cultural and traditional ways.

Thanks much,
sharon
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Witch Baby

Sep 11th, 2006 - 6:37 PM Re: For LeeLee.

Hi LeeLee, it's always killed me when someone is unbelievably ignorant or indifferent to my/our culture.I still want to educate myself further but I have always stood for all Natives, no matter if I was speaking for my direct biological tribe(s) or not; we're all connected in the end anyways. <3 It is so hard to keep oneself in check and to let it go. But Jay is right, battle the fool with knowledge! Stand tall for you and your little girl! You can do it, Peace and Light <3
The Berkshires! ^-^
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feistyfilly

Sep 12th, 2006 - 9:08 AM Re: For LeeLee.

Every culture/race has a gift from their culture to offer people. When people are prejudiced they deny themselves this magnificent gift and the connection to another person. I don't know if it's because they are raised with these thoughts or they are unhappy with who they are and take it out on a particular group. My former boyfriend is Apache. He sometimes would say that I can't imagine what it is like to look like him because he looks different. He is absolutely beautiful inside and outside. No, I can't imagine what it feels like but for the first time I experienced prejudice. Someone made a comment about my background as I am Jewish. Wow, I felt so violated, vulnerable and attacked. And amazed that people are prejudiced. But, perhaps when people are touched by our "spirit" they will learn and see and perhaps be challenged by what they believe (the stereotypes) about a culture or race is not true.
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