Post by Totems4jt on Jul 9, 2008 11:44:38 GMT -5
Jay Tavare
Apr 16, 05 - 12:07 PM For Meg.
Dear Meg, I don't need to ask how you are feeling so I will say Nant-lass (Stay Strong). The realization of seeing a loved one weakening is never easy but this is not the end. You must stay strong for her as she is doing so for you by hanging in there. Pray and spend time with her if you can but know in your heart that the Great Mystery has a plan for all of us and we can never second guess it. You must surrender and pray hard and try to keep your family in your heart. Out of this pain you will grow. I know that is not what you want but your mom needs your positive energy right now. The last thing she wants to see is seeing you sad and broken. Dig deep as in times like this we truly understand the meaning of life and what is really important to us. Remember every cell in your body contains part of your mom and through you she will live forever just as your kids will give you and everyone who has gone before you the same chance. We are all connected and I am honored that I can be a light in the darkest of hours ... And there is always enough light for the one who wants to see! Keep your head to the sky and cherish every moment with your family. I should know I never had that chance and I see all of you as my extended family. I pray for you and your mom and reach out to you to say never give up, never surrender and good luck will find you.
With all my compassion,
Jay
____________________________________________________
sami
Apr 16th, 2005 - 12:40 PM Re: For Meg.
Wow Jay, I hope that Meg reads your post soon, I'm sure it will make her feel better.
I'm praying for her and I'm sure that everyone else is too. Good to know that you are on here to cheer her up.
Stay cool.
Rock the kasbah.
Meg, stay chipper. Take care of yourself!
Ya can email me if you want to have someone to vent to.
Cheers,
sami
____________________________________________________
Running Red Fox
Apr 16th, 2005 - 12:58 PM For Meg.
I am speechless.
I'll just add this prayer.
The Creator's way may twist & turn,
my heart my throb and ache.
But in my soul I'm glad I know,
He maketh no mistake.
For Jay, Meg and the extended Jaybird Family.....Group Hug
____________________________________________________
Shygirl
Apr 16th, 2005 - 2:33 PM Re: For Meg.
I have to say that I am at a lost for words. The fact that u took the time Jay is hitting the core of my heart. It is just further proof of what a good spirit that u are and I know that Megan will be trully lifted by her role models kindness and love and true compassion.
We all Love u Megan and wish u the best.
-Shygirl
____________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 5:52 PM Toosie
Toosie - your mom sounds like a real trooper, just like mine! An oncologist told my mother that she should just give up and that chemo would be a waste of time. You know what she told him? "Up yours!"
It's hard.. trust me, I know. The comforting thought that I keep is that everything happens exactly as it's supposed to in the order it's meant to occur. I'm aiming for my mom to have a blast with whatever time she has left (and I'm keeping faith that she has plenty of good years left on her). I love to make her laugh and have keep conversations with her and learn all the nuances about her past that I didn't know before. I would one day love to write about my mom, and that would be my way of keeping her alive long after she's gone.
Everyone has a story and I don't think anyone should have to pass on with their story untold.
Enjoy every precious moment that you have.
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
____________________________________________________
Claire Valencia
Apr 16th, 2005 - 6:02 PM Re: For Meg.-Jay you are one of a kind
Thank you Jay-
..For doing something that will make such a difference in Meg's life. To you this may seem like a little gesture-some small way of easing Meg's pain. But-quite the contrary. Just knowing somebody you care about and admire-cares about you as well- makes all the difference in the world. Those were beautiful/eloquent words you shared from the heart.
Meg-
I hope you read this soon and feel just how much the chief and everyone "on down" the line -cares about you and your family. There IS strength in numbers. Love to you...
C.V.
____________________________________________________
Fontenel
Apr 16th, 2005 - 11:29 PM Re: For Meg.
THANK YOU JAY FOR YOUR KIND WORDS... You have such a Heartbeat. Jay ...Peace Fontenel
____________________________________________________
Dazzle
Apr 16th, 2005 - 11:40 PM Re: For Meg.
Toosie & Meg,
I send Godly Blessings for both of your paths. Our thoughts and prayers are contiuously with you. At a time like this I often think of the story of 'The Footpaths' in the sand. And how during this 'time of trial', one does not walk beside the Lord, but is carried by Him. Take heart, and be of good cheer. Our moms more than any, sense what we feel,you must stay positive for them as well as yourselves.
Jay,
It is very considerate of you to take a moment writing such thoughtful and caring words to your fans. Many would not waste the time. Though you may feel your gesture is a small one, just knowing that you care means so much to us all.
Be Blessed
Dazz
____________________________________________________
Christi
Apr 17th, 2005 - 3:55 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg,
I hope that Jay's and our messages have brought you some comfort.
Jay,
Thank you.
____________________________________________________
Alibear
Apr 17th, 2005 - 5:24 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg
I am so sorry to hear about your mum and what the two of you are facing together right now.
It is not only the cancer that is making your mum very sick, but also the chemo treatment. So if indeed the doctors do discontinue it, please try not to look at it in a negative way. Her body may well have taken as much as it can take, where the chemo is concerned.
Look into alternative ways that may help your mum. One of the first things I look at with my patients is there diets, because it takes a lot of valuable energy for the body to digest the process foods that many of us eat today, and it takes far less energy for the body to digest fresh food, which means that the body has more energy to fight any diseases etc, not to mention fresh food provides far more vital nutrients for the body to heal itself.
I cannot stress enough the importance of physical contact with another human being, especially when we are ill. It brings incredible comfort to a seriously ill person, but also to the person giving it. In other words, it would also help you Meg, in coming to terms with your mum’s illness.
If it’s possible, I would consider having a qualified aromatherapist or reflexologist to come and visit mum, as it is proven to bring much comfort in stressful situations like these.
If this isn’t possible, a lot of touching from you is just as good, like holding her hand when you are talking with one another, stroking her shoulders and back, etc, and of course ‘hugs’.
So you see, allowing them to stop the chemo doesn’t mean giving up, it means that for whatever time your Mum may have left, that it could be a better quality of life than being made very sick by the chemo, which is no longer benefiting your mums very weakened state.
Prayer also brings so much healing, it may not be on the physical level that most human beings expect or want, but a healing most definitely takes place, not only for the recipient but also the sender, for it touches the soul within in many ways. So never underestimate the power of prayer, or what it can achieve and do.
And do remember Meg! That you are not only a loving daughter, but a much needed friend to your mum.
To have a friend is to have one of the
Sweetest gifts that life can bring;
To be a friend is to have a solemn and tender
Education of soul from day to day.
I think through this your soul is experiencing the solemn and tender education, and it can be tough.
My Heart felt Healing Blessings to you
Ali
P.S Loved Jay's responce to you, there is indeed much wisdom and caring thought going on in that young mind, and I'm sure it will bring you comfort Meg.
mariann-online.com/forum/index.php
___________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 6:00 PM Re: For Meg.
Alibear, you offered a lot of great suggestions and advice! My mom is looking up holistic doctors, but unfortunately her insurance won't cover the costs. I offered to help in any way I can. She recent got a reading done by a medical intuitive. Without knowing anything about her life, the intuitive told her that there was a person who was toxic in my mom's life and that her white blood cells were reacting to the toxic stress they caused. She knew who that person was right away - my stepfather. He's been cheating on her for a few years now and she's pretended not to notice so she can stay on his health insurance. Without him, she's completely uninsured. I'm without a doubt that this stressful relationship (if one could call it a relationship at all) is not helping her one bit. I've offered her the option of getting out of her position and becoming my dependant so she can get added to my health insurance, but the decision would have to be her's. I can only hope she chooses wisely.
Thank you for your advice! I appreciate it so much more than you know and I will pass it on to her as soon as I can!
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
____________________________________________________
Miss Davis
Apr 17th, 2005 - 4:51 PM Re: For Meg.
Wow! Jay, thank you for taking your time out to speak such kind and encouraging words to Meg. I truly hope that whenever you hit another rough spot in life that there will be those in your circle that will be able to truly lift you up the same way that you lift us all with your warmth and kindness!
God bless you, Jay!
Sincerely,
Miss Davis
____________________________________________________
Beaverdam
Apr 17th, 2005 - 5:20 PM Re: For Meg.
Hi Ali...hope it is ok with everyone if I say hi to Ali here. Always good to see Ali wherever it may be.
BD
Yanno JT...you are a class act, thanks for letting me say hi to my friend Ali on your board.
____________________________________________________
Barbara
Apr 17th, 2005 - 6:00 PM Re: For Meg.
Strength in numbers, that`s right. And Sami`s right about MD Anderson Hosp in Houston. They`ve been on the cutting edge for years. Here again, everyone put everything so beautifully, I don`t know what I can add except I`m in the chorus, too.
____________________________________________________
Morningstar
Apr 18th, 2005 - 2:07 AM Re: For Meg.
I adore that man. His compassion for others run so deep.
Your Location: sweetmew2000@yahoo.com
www.ExquisiteIndulgence.com
___________________________________________________
Shuandalyn
Apr 18th, 2005 - 6:45 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg, we're praying for you and your family! What Jay spoke of is true. Be strong!
Jay, you rock the kasbah!
Love to both of you!
____________________________________________________
Christi
Apr 18th, 2005 - 7:41 AM Re: For Meg.
Toosie,
There is no need for you to apologize.
____________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 5:44 PM Wow!
When I posted my original message, I was in quite a bit of emotional pain that I had never felt before and I had no idea that it would get so much attention - and from Jay himself! Jay and all of my fellow Jaybirds, thank you so very much for taking time out to offer me this overwhelming support.
As soon as I saw Jay's reply, I couldn't respond right away.. I really had to think about it. And that's exactly what I did as I've spent every day the past few days running my legs off and working out harder than ever before. It wasn't until today that I realized that this forum is a larger form of inspiration than I noticed even from the beginning. I love the regular positive postings and new ideas presented and expressed. Believe me, I'm a regular reader even though I don't post often!
You guys (my wonderful Jaybirds as well as the wonderful Jay himself) have no idea how much of an influence you all are. Instead of potentially wallowing into a pit of despair and sinking into depression, I now feel so much stronger and more capable of handling this situation.
My mother is the toughest woman I've ever known and I would be blessed to inherit some of her hard-as-nails grit. I'll help her through the long haul of chemotherapy and when she passes away (which will be someday, as everyone has a time to go - no one knows exactly when), I will use that experience to face what is ultimately my biggest fear (death).
My husband said it best: "No one ever really dies. We simply change into a different form."
Jay and Jaybirds - my most heartfelt thanks extend to every single one of you! And of course, I'll keep you all posted.
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
___________________________________________________
Shygirl
Apr 19th, 2005 - 5:22 AM Re: Wow!
Meg I am so happy that u finally saw this post. I was so worried about u seeing it (sometimes post go bye-bye)That I emailed u letting u know that it was here. I do not know whether u got my email but I am so happy to see that u got Jay's message.
Apr 16, 05 - 12:07 PM For Meg.
Dear Meg, I don't need to ask how you are feeling so I will say Nant-lass (Stay Strong). The realization of seeing a loved one weakening is never easy but this is not the end. You must stay strong for her as she is doing so for you by hanging in there. Pray and spend time with her if you can but know in your heart that the Great Mystery has a plan for all of us and we can never second guess it. You must surrender and pray hard and try to keep your family in your heart. Out of this pain you will grow. I know that is not what you want but your mom needs your positive energy right now. The last thing she wants to see is seeing you sad and broken. Dig deep as in times like this we truly understand the meaning of life and what is really important to us. Remember every cell in your body contains part of your mom and through you she will live forever just as your kids will give you and everyone who has gone before you the same chance. We are all connected and I am honored that I can be a light in the darkest of hours ... And there is always enough light for the one who wants to see! Keep your head to the sky and cherish every moment with your family. I should know I never had that chance and I see all of you as my extended family. I pray for you and your mom and reach out to you to say never give up, never surrender and good luck will find you.
With all my compassion,
Jay
____________________________________________________
sami
Apr 16th, 2005 - 12:40 PM Re: For Meg.
Wow Jay, I hope that Meg reads your post soon, I'm sure it will make her feel better.
I'm praying for her and I'm sure that everyone else is too. Good to know that you are on here to cheer her up.
Stay cool.
Rock the kasbah.
Meg, stay chipper. Take care of yourself!
Ya can email me if you want to have someone to vent to.
Cheers,
sami
____________________________________________________
Running Red Fox
Apr 16th, 2005 - 12:58 PM For Meg.
I am speechless.
I'll just add this prayer.
The Creator's way may twist & turn,
my heart my throb and ache.
But in my soul I'm glad I know,
He maketh no mistake.
For Jay, Meg and the extended Jaybird Family.....Group Hug
____________________________________________________
Shygirl
Apr 16th, 2005 - 2:33 PM Re: For Meg.
I have to say that I am at a lost for words. The fact that u took the time Jay is hitting the core of my heart. It is just further proof of what a good spirit that u are and I know that Megan will be trully lifted by her role models kindness and love and true compassion.
We all Love u Megan and wish u the best.
-Shygirl
____________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 5:52 PM Toosie
Toosie - your mom sounds like a real trooper, just like mine! An oncologist told my mother that she should just give up and that chemo would be a waste of time. You know what she told him? "Up yours!"
It's hard.. trust me, I know. The comforting thought that I keep is that everything happens exactly as it's supposed to in the order it's meant to occur. I'm aiming for my mom to have a blast with whatever time she has left (and I'm keeping faith that she has plenty of good years left on her). I love to make her laugh and have keep conversations with her and learn all the nuances about her past that I didn't know before. I would one day love to write about my mom, and that would be my way of keeping her alive long after she's gone.
Everyone has a story and I don't think anyone should have to pass on with their story untold.
Enjoy every precious moment that you have.
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
____________________________________________________
Claire Valencia
Apr 16th, 2005 - 6:02 PM Re: For Meg.-Jay you are one of a kind
Thank you Jay-
..For doing something that will make such a difference in Meg's life. To you this may seem like a little gesture-some small way of easing Meg's pain. But-quite the contrary. Just knowing somebody you care about and admire-cares about you as well- makes all the difference in the world. Those were beautiful/eloquent words you shared from the heart.
Meg-
I hope you read this soon and feel just how much the chief and everyone "on down" the line -cares about you and your family. There IS strength in numbers. Love to you...
C.V.
____________________________________________________
Fontenel
Apr 16th, 2005 - 11:29 PM Re: For Meg.
THANK YOU JAY FOR YOUR KIND WORDS... You have such a Heartbeat. Jay ...Peace Fontenel
____________________________________________________
Dazzle
Apr 16th, 2005 - 11:40 PM Re: For Meg.
Toosie & Meg,
I send Godly Blessings for both of your paths. Our thoughts and prayers are contiuously with you. At a time like this I often think of the story of 'The Footpaths' in the sand. And how during this 'time of trial', one does not walk beside the Lord, but is carried by Him. Take heart, and be of good cheer. Our moms more than any, sense what we feel,you must stay positive for them as well as yourselves.
Jay,
It is very considerate of you to take a moment writing such thoughtful and caring words to your fans. Many would not waste the time. Though you may feel your gesture is a small one, just knowing that you care means so much to us all.
Be Blessed
Dazz
____________________________________________________
Christi
Apr 17th, 2005 - 3:55 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg,
I hope that Jay's and our messages have brought you some comfort.
Jay,
Thank you.
____________________________________________________
Alibear
Apr 17th, 2005 - 5:24 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg
I am so sorry to hear about your mum and what the two of you are facing together right now.
It is not only the cancer that is making your mum very sick, but also the chemo treatment. So if indeed the doctors do discontinue it, please try not to look at it in a negative way. Her body may well have taken as much as it can take, where the chemo is concerned.
Look into alternative ways that may help your mum. One of the first things I look at with my patients is there diets, because it takes a lot of valuable energy for the body to digest the process foods that many of us eat today, and it takes far less energy for the body to digest fresh food, which means that the body has more energy to fight any diseases etc, not to mention fresh food provides far more vital nutrients for the body to heal itself.
I cannot stress enough the importance of physical contact with another human being, especially when we are ill. It brings incredible comfort to a seriously ill person, but also to the person giving it. In other words, it would also help you Meg, in coming to terms with your mum’s illness.
If it’s possible, I would consider having a qualified aromatherapist or reflexologist to come and visit mum, as it is proven to bring much comfort in stressful situations like these.
If this isn’t possible, a lot of touching from you is just as good, like holding her hand when you are talking with one another, stroking her shoulders and back, etc, and of course ‘hugs’.
So you see, allowing them to stop the chemo doesn’t mean giving up, it means that for whatever time your Mum may have left, that it could be a better quality of life than being made very sick by the chemo, which is no longer benefiting your mums very weakened state.
Prayer also brings so much healing, it may not be on the physical level that most human beings expect or want, but a healing most definitely takes place, not only for the recipient but also the sender, for it touches the soul within in many ways. So never underestimate the power of prayer, or what it can achieve and do.
And do remember Meg! That you are not only a loving daughter, but a much needed friend to your mum.
To have a friend is to have one of the
Sweetest gifts that life can bring;
To be a friend is to have a solemn and tender
Education of soul from day to day.
I think through this your soul is experiencing the solemn and tender education, and it can be tough.
My Heart felt Healing Blessings to you
Ali
P.S Loved Jay's responce to you, there is indeed much wisdom and caring thought going on in that young mind, and I'm sure it will bring you comfort Meg.
mariann-online.com/forum/index.php
___________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 6:00 PM Re: For Meg.
Alibear, you offered a lot of great suggestions and advice! My mom is looking up holistic doctors, but unfortunately her insurance won't cover the costs. I offered to help in any way I can. She recent got a reading done by a medical intuitive. Without knowing anything about her life, the intuitive told her that there was a person who was toxic in my mom's life and that her white blood cells were reacting to the toxic stress they caused. She knew who that person was right away - my stepfather. He's been cheating on her for a few years now and she's pretended not to notice so she can stay on his health insurance. Without him, she's completely uninsured. I'm without a doubt that this stressful relationship (if one could call it a relationship at all) is not helping her one bit. I've offered her the option of getting out of her position and becoming my dependant so she can get added to my health insurance, but the decision would have to be her's. I can only hope she chooses wisely.
Thank you for your advice! I appreciate it so much more than you know and I will pass it on to her as soon as I can!
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
____________________________________________________
Miss Davis
Apr 17th, 2005 - 4:51 PM Re: For Meg.
Wow! Jay, thank you for taking your time out to speak such kind and encouraging words to Meg. I truly hope that whenever you hit another rough spot in life that there will be those in your circle that will be able to truly lift you up the same way that you lift us all with your warmth and kindness!
God bless you, Jay!
Sincerely,
Miss Davis
____________________________________________________
Beaverdam
Apr 17th, 2005 - 5:20 PM Re: For Meg.
Hi Ali...hope it is ok with everyone if I say hi to Ali here. Always good to see Ali wherever it may be.
BD
Yanno JT...you are a class act, thanks for letting me say hi to my friend Ali on your board.
____________________________________________________
Barbara
Apr 17th, 2005 - 6:00 PM Re: For Meg.
Strength in numbers, that`s right. And Sami`s right about MD Anderson Hosp in Houston. They`ve been on the cutting edge for years. Here again, everyone put everything so beautifully, I don`t know what I can add except I`m in the chorus, too.
____________________________________________________
Morningstar
Apr 18th, 2005 - 2:07 AM Re: For Meg.
I adore that man. His compassion for others run so deep.
Your Location: sweetmew2000@yahoo.com
www.ExquisiteIndulgence.com
___________________________________________________
Shuandalyn
Apr 18th, 2005 - 6:45 AM Re: For Meg.
Meg, we're praying for you and your family! What Jay spoke of is true. Be strong!
Jay, you rock the kasbah!
Love to both of you!
____________________________________________________
Christi
Apr 18th, 2005 - 7:41 AM Re: For Meg.
Toosie,
There is no need for you to apologize.
____________________________________________________
Meg
Apr 18th, 2005 - 5:44 PM Wow!
When I posted my original message, I was in quite a bit of emotional pain that I had never felt before and I had no idea that it would get so much attention - and from Jay himself! Jay and all of my fellow Jaybirds, thank you so very much for taking time out to offer me this overwhelming support.
As soon as I saw Jay's reply, I couldn't respond right away.. I really had to think about it. And that's exactly what I did as I've spent every day the past few days running my legs off and working out harder than ever before. It wasn't until today that I realized that this forum is a larger form of inspiration than I noticed even from the beginning. I love the regular positive postings and new ideas presented and expressed. Believe me, I'm a regular reader even though I don't post often!
You guys (my wonderful Jaybirds as well as the wonderful Jay himself) have no idea how much of an influence you all are. Instead of potentially wallowing into a pit of despair and sinking into depression, I now feel so much stronger and more capable of handling this situation.
My mother is the toughest woman I've ever known and I would be blessed to inherit some of her hard-as-nails grit. I'll help her through the long haul of chemotherapy and when she passes away (which will be someday, as everyone has a time to go - no one knows exactly when), I will use that experience to face what is ultimately my biggest fear (death).
My husband said it best: "No one ever really dies. We simply change into a different form."
Jay and Jaybirds - my most heartfelt thanks extend to every single one of you! And of course, I'll keep you all posted.
romymaj@aol.com
AIM: Romy Maj
___________________________________________________
Shygirl
Apr 19th, 2005 - 5:22 AM Re: Wow!
Meg I am so happy that u finally saw this post. I was so worried about u seeing it (sometimes post go bye-bye)That I emailed u letting u know that it was here. I do not know whether u got my email but I am so happy to see that u got Jay's message.